In some instances, practice was great. Got great show ups, was able to network w/ both boys and girls BB coaches about available space - and just the supreme talent of the girls displayed. But also, my confidence was so shaken, and my 'life a a fraud' coach exposed, and there is no future for me as a productive individual in this world (despite the image of Nevada and the smoke and the flag fluttering @ the bow).
There were two 'incidents' @ practice. One was a disagreement w/ one of the captains about conditioning. @ Led and @ Nek, we had the kids going in the gyms all winter playing soccer on BBall courts for hours. But these girls - they actually wanna RUN instead of play indoor. Their argument is is that we already know how to play - we've (Varsity) been playing all winter - but we need to run to get into better shape for the season. I counter argued my usual argument - i've been coaching before you were alive, I've coached @ Led and Nek, I know what i'm doing - but sometime between the early AM and the afternoon, it was like a sneak attack by he Japanese inside my head, and the disagreement w/ one of my captains rocked me badly. This is my first time running a program, and usually I'm so confident. Disagree w/ me, kids? But look @ all the work I have done for you, starting our conditioning TWO FUCKING MONTHS ahead of last year, getting FIVE EXTRA GAMES FOR YOU TO FUCKING PLAY IN - not the goddamed seven of last year.
And, again, I realised that= I have to listen more and learn more and get better all the time.
I took two of my favourite varsity players aside and asked them what they wanted - and they instantly responded RUNNING!!
Disabused. They want to run on Monday? I will have to change practice for them. There is a delicate balance between running the team but also listening to yr charges. There is also the very noted (books and book and books) difference betwixt coaching boys (jus' scream @ them) and girls (Now, girls - are we all agreed? We're all in this decision to-gether? We can move forward ?)
I have to remember to learn as well.
The second incident was terrible. Last year I coached the JV @ this school. It was, w/out a doubt, my favourite coaching experience ever. Ever. i did well, and it inspired tall confidence in me that can do something in this world instead of just collecting Love, I can help create the condition for it to be manufactured (it's really fun to be part of a team - really fun). I loved - loved that experience (read last Avril and Mai's posts on the team). Deeply moving for me. That last game against the Premier League Champion in the city quarterfinals when my star put us up 1-0 in the second minute? Wow!
And one of my precious players - and remember I'll never have children, so this is as close as I will ever get - was deeply upset w/ me after practice. She asked to speak w/ me. She'd been hurt by an off remark that'd said yesterday. I was totally caught off guard by her being so upset - she not only being a great kids who I loved on last years team, but who I also teached for two months last year when I subbed for her teacher.
What she was mad @:
2d coach is unfamiliar w/ the players, so he was asking me whose on V. (mine) and who were to be on his (JV). When it came it the girl in question, I remarked something along the lines that she'll never make Varsity this year. This is what she got upset about. Now, understand: she hasn't a chance to break into the starting lineup this year. No way. She's not only gotta have an ENORMOUS amount more seasoning - BIG TIME seasoning- but also if she thinks she's gonna get anything more than 5 minutes a game on varsity - actually, if she thinks I will actually put her in any game that isn't a rout - she's pretty much mistaken. Our starting defenders are beasts, and I have full confidence in them. For her - I actually have A STARTING POSITION ON VARSITY waiting for her - but it's next year, after she has learned more - much more - on JV.
She's such a mild mannered kid - an honors student who is on time and works hard - that it was shocking hearing her explaining why she was upset w/ me. She thinks she deserves a spot - if she can win it - but I so want her on V next year -deeply need her - since everyone is graduating. So - this precious child, upset w/ me w/ how I assigned her to JV.
But she's gotta understand - I do have a plan. I've been working on it since last year.
However, I gotta understand, as well. They're just kids, and there are to be about 60 of them. They are all different - as am I - and I realise that there is so much more work I don't even know about still to be confronted. I want my program to steam towards open seas - and not get stuck in the channel.
There were two 'incidents' @ practice. One was a disagreement w/ one of the captains about conditioning. @ Led and @ Nek, we had the kids going in the gyms all winter playing soccer on BBall courts for hours. But these girls - they actually wanna RUN instead of play indoor. Their argument is is that we already know how to play - we've (Varsity) been playing all winter - but we need to run to get into better shape for the season. I counter argued my usual argument - i've been coaching before you were alive, I've coached @ Led and Nek, I know what i'm doing - but sometime between the early AM and the afternoon, it was like a sneak attack by he Japanese inside my head, and the disagreement w/ one of my captains rocked me badly. This is my first time running a program, and usually I'm so confident. Disagree w/ me, kids? But look @ all the work I have done for you, starting our conditioning TWO FUCKING MONTHS ahead of last year, getting FIVE EXTRA GAMES FOR YOU TO FUCKING PLAY IN - not the goddamed seven of last year.
And, again, I realised that= I have to listen more and learn more and get better all the time.
I took two of my favourite varsity players aside and asked them what they wanted - and they instantly responded RUNNING!!
Disabused. They want to run on Monday? I will have to change practice for them. There is a delicate balance between running the team but also listening to yr charges. There is also the very noted (books and book and books) difference betwixt coaching boys (jus' scream @ them) and girls (Now, girls - are we all agreed? We're all in this decision to-gether? We can move forward ?)
I have to remember to learn as well.
The second incident was terrible. Last year I coached the JV @ this school. It was, w/out a doubt, my favourite coaching experience ever. Ever. i did well, and it inspired tall confidence in me that can do something in this world instead of just collecting Love, I can help create the condition for it to be manufactured (it's really fun to be part of a team - really fun). I loved - loved that experience (read last Avril and Mai's posts on the team). Deeply moving for me. That last game against the Premier League Champion in the city quarterfinals when my star put us up 1-0 in the second minute? Wow!
And one of my precious players - and remember I'll never have children, so this is as close as I will ever get - was deeply upset w/ me after practice. She asked to speak w/ me. She'd been hurt by an off remark that'd said yesterday. I was totally caught off guard by her being so upset - she not only being a great kids who I loved on last years team, but who I also teached for two months last year when I subbed for her teacher.
What she was mad @:
2d coach is unfamiliar w/ the players, so he was asking me whose on V. (mine) and who were to be on his (JV). When it came it the girl in question, I remarked something along the lines that she'll never make Varsity this year. This is what she got upset about. Now, understand: she hasn't a chance to break into the starting lineup this year. No way. She's not only gotta have an ENORMOUS amount more seasoning - BIG TIME seasoning- but also if she thinks she's gonna get anything more than 5 minutes a game on varsity - actually, if she thinks I will actually put her in any game that isn't a rout - she's pretty much mistaken. Our starting defenders are beasts, and I have full confidence in them. For her - I actually have A STARTING POSITION ON VARSITY waiting for her - but it's next year, after she has learned more - much more - on JV.
She's such a mild mannered kid - an honors student who is on time and works hard - that it was shocking hearing her explaining why she was upset w/ me. She thinks she deserves a spot - if she can win it - but I so want her on V next year -deeply need her - since everyone is graduating. So - this precious child, upset w/ me w/ how I assigned her to JV.
But she's gotta understand - I do have a plan. I've been working on it since last year.
However, I gotta understand, as well. They're just kids, and there are to be about 60 of them. They are all different - as am I - and I realise that there is so much more work I don't even know about still to be confronted. I want my program to steam towards open seas - and not get stuck in the channel.
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