if y dont tri, y wont be dissapoint'd

All my life, finishing anything off. Anything. The rue of me. Decades go, and ideas that were heavier than Atlas's load finally are shoehorned into a workable format - then decades go tho and here I am.

Films are an easy deal. I have, easily, 20 2-3m films purely to go. Well, the shots were thought out - but the shooting sites, angles, actors... not there. But in what format? Burnishments of Monty Python adorn my epaulets, so that solution - hey, no plot, no punchlines, and be as out there as you want to. Then there are the need for actors. I always thought fair ground would be to use my nieces and nephews a lot - but they have grown up, need the time themselves, and although they deeply love their uncle, it's hard to gather them. Plus, the need for female actors. Dudes will not blanche @, say, a fart joke. But when it comes time to ask a girl to do a riff on cuckolding ..... I cant ask my nieces to do that (I know, I should, and the artists out there are disappointed in me, but...)

Music is another aspect - and a much easier arena to produce.

It's been a year now since I learned how to play the guitar at this level (I'll say it now - I can play, at a beginner level -but i am a guitarist now, no doubt). At first I was overjoyed just to be able to play some cords. But the deal now is, of course, to write my own stuff - which, of course, I have. I had soe riffs, but now some of these riffs have been linked in ways that I accept. Now, Ive written songs when I was in grammer school (advantages of growing up a punk rocker) - but these are the first, y'know, actual tuneful songs to be produced.

There's ,more. I can play, yes - but over the years Ive collected many instruments. Now, It's not like Blackies "music room" - but i do have a piano, a snare drum, tambourine, washboard, various whistles and fifes, maracas, and my own imagination. So - have instruments, have a little bit of ability, and---- have the Audacity program that allows me to record stuff. The last addition was this deeply beautiful microphone - a stunner - that really nicely records what I play and sing.

For me, then, I should start reeling off song after song. Not great songs, i know - simple - but in my decades of being a rocker and artist, I fully realise simple is totally and completely equal to complex. It's all there.

But I have to put up my stopgates. It just can't be 'making music' - it has to be silly and cause a laff. So, as a small little hedge against my frenz - who love me deeply, i know- finding my music boring - my band consists of, rite now, me, Bolo, and Mom: Fassbinder - which originally started as 'The Pasolini Trio'. So, w. a blind dog and an 88yo woman as bandmates, Im 101% hedges against any criticism.

But also, just about any chance of actually presenting a song that has actual access to any accolades is impossible in this mode as well.

Said it before, but Rocky told me he expected a lot of art to be produced by me during my unempolyment period. He brought up a similar Blackie period where Banksy's and Shermans and Donovans were produced - in his style. His prompting has stuck in my head. I have to just get on w. it.