JURY DUTY !!
First off, it was kinda nice. Library work is so fucking hectic, I'm usually harried beyond belief an hour after I'm suposed to go home. I was supposed to go home, fex, 1 1/2 h ago, but had to do work on this blog (SHUT UP BRATS !!!! I'M TRYING TO BLOG HERE. GIVE ME 40 UNINTERRUPTED SECONDS!!!! Please ?). So, 1 1/2 h of reading time was very nice. Then I got called in to be 'interviewed' for the case; it was a small case, and I was one of the first 14 in the bench to be 'interviewed' by the defense and prosecution. Talk about repetative(sc).
However, I used it as a stage to, well, self aggrandise myself w/ some 'street cred'. y' know, iIadded colours to the chameleon.
So, the judge asks, have you or anyone you have known been the victim of a crime. Most people had a story about their house being burgleds or a friend who got punched. When it came to me, I told the judge that the number of crimes I've been a witness to (or etc...) was just too vast to catalog here. Truth, too.
Then, when it came to being arrested, one after another had not been. Then me. Well, there was that breaking and entering in '84 (it was actually trespass, but i like to tupac meself from time to time), and that felony in 92- but we beat that rap , and then there was that disorderly conduct last year. And then, yr honour, there s been, like , 15-20 times when, whats the term ( 'in custody' would be what I was looking for) for when (i mimed my wrists to-gether ).
All of this was true, I have been cuffed like 15x and spent three seperate nites in jail.
Seems like I'm the motherfucker thats out to kill , but in reality, I'm a wee bit more fey* than those jurors probably took me. Plus, I also had to document my 'other/non thug' side to my audience, so I made sure I mentioned being an 'undergraduate' and was reading the NYT, though not just for effect. Fun playing a part, even though I guess it was, well, all true.
Never got picked. The prosecution didn't want me.
*way way more fey !!
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