Shine a Light

fuck you for waht yr saying to me, jerk...............

When I................got a song........stuck...in my head.......google........find those lyrics...............for me ? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"Shine A Light"
by Spiritualized

When I'm tired and all alone
Lord shine a light on me
And when I'm lonesome as can be
Lord shine a light on me


When I'm tired and all alone
Lord shine a light on me
And when I'm lonesome as can be
Lord shine a light on me

Lord shine a light on me
Lord shine a light on me
Lord shine a light on me

Not my Starlings

all of my tears

Age and work have really cut into my concert schedule. Remember when we used to go to @ least a show a week? metro -err, cabaret Metro - was the center of the universe? Remember getting there hours before the show so we could be front and center, and going to take a piss be dammned?

Well, was @ the Metro for the first time since....... well, since game 2 of the 2003 NL playoffs (I remember because - and i've writen this before - but that nite I was triple decked in the black and silver and walked straight through the crowd of the great unwashed outside of Wrigley. I do so love to appear from time to time in crowds of that sort to feel the power of myself. And to attract lots and lots of attention.). Have I seen a show since 2003 @ the Metro? I can't remember (it was that hippy group that has like 20 members in the group- i'm in the video for tat one song they recoreded that nite).

2003. Jeeze. Err, make that Sheesh, so I'm not so irreligious.

But last nites show was a return to those days, I feel. Dragon and I saw Spiritualised, and guess what?

Great show.

Great show as it was -DO NOT confuse it Spiritualised 1996 or 1997. It wasn't Shockingly Stand Still Because We're Right At The Front Of The Stage And I'm Freaking Out , or the Can I Please Drop To My Knees In Prayer Because This Fucking Show In An Ex Church in Michigan Is Freaking My System Down- but it was a great rock show. It was better than Pitchfork - something about inside a small club w/ a thousand crowd rather than 17,000 people in an outdoor fest - and I will testify that it was brilliant.

And I didn't expect it. It's been awhile since I really rocked out to Spiritualised on a daily basis- yes, I did see them over the summer and continually played - when it was in bloom - that live Glastonbury "Take Yr Time" - possibly my favourite version of possibly my favourite song of theirs - but their mailine time in my life has basicsally passed. Still lov'em, but their centrality is not central. However, they but on such trancendent shows, that when I can , i will always see them.

That Double door show a decade ago - wow. Such a impact. It wasn't music to danse to - Vamdom (this is a man who lives in Cali and is no longer frenz w/ Vito - i used to think he looked like a vampire when he had shoulder lenght hair. Not to be confused also w/ the Vampire, so named because of Halloweens passed.) pointed that out because in those days we were streaked wet w/ salty sweat and freezing in our tropically drenched t shirts because we jumped and danced and turned and flipping the hair and dansed and dansed and dansed - but this 1996 show, at the Double Door - wasn't that sort of show.

But the thing was, it was so good, we wee boys didn't actually have to dance our way through the rock show to totally get some sorta kick ass experience - we just stood there and let it....wash all over us. We were in a moment, no movement seemed necessary, and it was wonderous. That Church show a little later duplicated the feeling. Those two shows showed me that although dansing is a key to some shows - it certainly wasn't for all.

And guess what - last nites show, I dansed to half the fucking songs. Spiritualised - a DANSE BAND? Certianly not - except for last nite. "Walking w/ Jesus" , another song, "Good Dope/Good Fun" (Yes, The Voice Screamed out after that song "THAT WAS FUN!!" , since I knew "CUT YR HAIR HIPPIES" mite be misunderstood by the band), and the song that ended the set "...The Other Side" - was the best.

Oh - there was time to stare and enjoy - they certainly did play "Shine a Light" as they always have. Wasn't a perfect show, however. There were some standing/staring/wondering "when will this song end?" songs, of course. Spiritualised specializes in long and LOUD feedback jams. Some left me waiting for the end, but others.....well, more or less took me to the other side. And some of the other songs that have made me stand/stare in the past decade - "All of my Tears" or "Take your time" come to mind - were NOT PLAYED. But that's ok - hate to see the Beatles play again and only play the covers they did @ the Cavern Club.

Ans Jason? Didn't tell him a gallohello - I forgot, and he probably wouldn't have wanted me yelling out "Gallo says hello !!". But Happy was the Dude - really - he very obviously was having a great time and when they came back for an encore - more obviously happy body language.

I just had a good time. There was maybe plans to hit the Sox game that nite - only 13 home left and it was 1/2 price nite - but decided the Thursday nite game (yes, J and B'r's, mite mean I'ma missing that nite - and maybe more)and maybe Friday were betetr bets. Especially since the rain had turned out Comiskey's lights. There were plans to go totally lazy and stay @ home (and if our russian friend was in commision, I'da probably just stayed @ home - 2d day as I write, y'all). But Gf said I should go to the show, Dragon was going, and I was very happy. And funny. An ingrediant gone, and I go from standing and staring to dansing the whole show (well, 1/3 of the show). I should learn. And I should go to more concerts and Sox games. I really should.

funny cause it's true

from the curried forests

there must be some kinda mistake...

See my way

stuck inside of o'hare w/ the helena blues again

greetings from Montana!!

Wait - I lied!!

I got a great 4am start on my Montana trip - my flite left @ 8am - by driving almost the entire way to the big airport. Then I got the El for the last few miles to avoid parking fees. funnyb- I thought it ap[propriate to park on the cousoins last block she lived in Chicago.

So, to the United desk, and found out that no my flite no longer existed: and that great plan that would get you to the wedding rite on time- well, sorry, but if you want to get into helena past 10pm for the 4pm reception - well, go ahead. So i decided to scop it all, dejectatly El my way back to the Peter Strasswe, and then home to paste myself rigerously.

The nite was derpessing. My cousin is one of my closest frenz, and somehow I missed waht I know to be a central point of her life (yeah, she's a girl in every way). I had no option when the morning flite was scuppered, but I'm mad i didn't fly in the nite before.

So, stuck in Chicago, should be in Montana this moment, dejected, sorroful, and really not looking forward to talking ot cousin..... glad now that I wasn't the dj

the west

i've been to the west of america before...california 15 times and a few airports in betwixt......but my cousin is now getting married, and im gonna be flying into helena regional airport soon......so, ill be in the middle west....no, the middle of the west...... or whatever for the first time.......i'd like to go for a longer bit, but this times a bit rushed, y'know........fly into denver, then switch planes and get on some small jet....... it's the getting up that gets me the ... early am as horrid equaliser.....and that i'd flied the idea of another marketgarden but was shot down by command.....still, i wonder if the morrow will bring dansing... i will be so dressed...

Hmm.
Never been this Paranoid.
Oh wait...

The White Whale

So, next to nothig done this summer, but the White Whale. So, some praise for an old lover. Q was such a big literary person, and she has had - and still does - a hold on my reading tastes still. Or @ least, the last little bits of her influence. She was the one who put Moby Dick into my mind with the simple phrase 'some think it the best bet as the great american novel. That statement once heard, Moby Dick had to be conquered by me.

Good book. There are many many digressions on a vast amount of things about whales - there are chapters devoted to describing the different sorts of whales - and there are even chapters devoted to describing pictures of whales. So, there is a lot of.....encloypedia time involved.

And it is Ahab who rules this book. Not perfect - Bloom is still my favourite made up person - but each time he takes the stage, it is like Mick or Morrissey out there. His crazyness is divine. His sweltering need to kill Moby Dick is what sets him apart. There are many times where thi gs would be better for the ship and crew if Ahab's obsession was not followed - but followed it was.

I won't ruin the ending fer ya, although I already knew. I'd seen the movie when I was but tyke, and I had the plot. That scene in the movie - it wasn't in the book.

There is great sadness in the book as well. The whalers are trying to kill alive beings, so it is really heartbreaking when the go throught and describe the hunt of the whales and their killing. Very sad. But a good book.

And came Dagwoods reply/

but on the desk is where I want you/

a moment in the sun

Onstage many times, sometimes caught on tv. Find this on Tejas' site. Spot Hilts.

virgil 3000

several months of vacation later,and I'm - ready - happy to be working again. Sub, of course, same school. Summer was kkiinda depressing. Lotsa time off, but there was no purpose to it. These last two summers have really sucked. I need to work next summer, somehow. I did work twoweeks subbing, but it wasn't enough.

I know, don't complain. But I drift in the hot times, and I am one person who shouldn't be drifting.

Well, @ least it won't be drifting into the street parade.

More later.

Just a touch/

CHAPTER 36

The Quarter-Deck.

(ENTER AHAB: THEN, ALL) It was not a great while after the affair of the pipe, that one morning shortly after breakfast, Ahab, as was his wont, ascended the cabin-gangway to the deck. There most sea-captains usually walk at that hour, as country gentlemen, after the same meal, take a few turns in the garden.

Soon his steady, ivory stride was heard, as to and fro he paced his old rounds, upon planks so familiar to his tread, that they were all over dented, like geological stones, with the peculiar mark of his walk. Did you fixedly gaze, too, upon that ribbed and dented brow; there also, you would see still stranger foot-prints--the foot-prints of his one unsleeping, ever-pacing thought.

But on the occasion in question, those dents looked deeper, even as his nervous step that morning left a deeper mark. And, so full of his thought was Ahab, that at every uniform turn that he made, now at the main-mast and now at the binnacle, you could almost see that thought turn in him as he turned, and pace in him as he paced; so completely possessing him, indeed, that it all but seemed the inward mould of every outer movement.

"D'ye mark him, Flask?" whispered Stubb; "the chick that's in him pecks the shell. 'Twill soon be out."

The hours wore on;--Ahab now shut up within his cabin; anon, pacing the deck, with the same intense bigotry of purpose in his aspect.

It drew near the close of day. Suddenly he came to a halt by the bulwarks, and inserting his bone leg into the auger-hole there, and with one hand grasping a shroud, he ordered Starbuck to send everybody aft.

"Sir!" said the mate, astonished at an order seldom or never given on ship-board except in some extraordinary case.

"Send everybody aft," repeated Ahab. "Mast-heads, there! come down!"

When the entire ship's company were assembled, and with curious and not wholly unapprehensive faces, were eyeing him, for he looked not unlike the weather horizon when a storm is coming up, Ahab, after rapidly glancing over the bulwarks, and then darting his eyes among the crew, started from his standpoint; and as though not a soul were nigh him resumed his heavy turns upon the deck. With bent head and half-slouched hat he continued to pace, unmindful of the wondering whispering among the men; till Stubb cautiously whispered to Flask, that Ahab must have summoned them there for the purpose of witnessing a pedestrian feat. But this did not last long. Vehemently pausing, he cried:--

"What do ye do when ye see a whale, men?"

"Sing out for him!" was the impulsive rejoinder from a score of clubbed voices.

"Good!" cried Ahab, with a wild approval in his tones; observing the hearty animation into which his unexpected question had so magnetically thrown them.

"And what do ye next, men?"

"Lower away, and after him!"

"And what tune is it ye pull to, men?"

"A dead whale or a stove boat!"

More and more strangely and fiercely glad and approving, grew the countenance of the old man at every shout; while the mariners began to gaze curiously at each other, as if marvelling how it was that they themselves became so excited at such seemingly purposeless questions.

But, they were all eagerness again, as Ahab, now half-revolving in his pivot-hole, with one hand reaching high up a shroud, and tightly, almost convulsively grasping it, addressed them thus:--

"All ye mast-headers have before now heard me give orders about a white whale. Look ye! d'ye see this Spanish ounce of gold?"--holding up a broad bright coin to the sun--"it is a sixteen dollar piece, men. D'ye see it? Mr. Starbuck, hand me yon top-maul."

While the mate was getting the hammer, Ahab, without speaking, was slowly rubbing the gold piece against the skirts of his jacket, as if to heighten its lustre, and without using any words was meanwhile lowly humming to himself, producing a sound so strangely muffled and inarticulate that it seemed the mechanical humming of the wheels of his vitality in him.

Receiving the top-maul from Starbuck, he advanced towards the main-mast with the hammer uplifted in one hand, exhibiting the gold with the other, and with a high raised voice exclaiming: "Whosoever of ye raises me a white-headed whale with a wrinkled brow and a crooked jaw; whosoever of ye raises me that white-headed whale, with three holes punctured in his starboard fluke--look ye, whosoever of ye raises me that same white whale, he shall have this gold ounce, my boys!"

"Huzza! huzza!" cried the seamen, as with swinging tarpaulins they hailed the act of nailing the gold to the mast.

"It's a white whale, I say," resumed Ahab, as he threw down the topmaul: "a white whale. Skin your eyes for him, men; look sharp for white water; if ye see but a bubble, sing out."

All this while Tashtego, Daggoo, and Queequeg had looked on with even more intense interest and surprise than the rest, and at the mention of the wrinkled brow and crooked jaw they had started as if each was separately touched by some specific recollection.

"Captain Ahab," said Tashtego, "that white whale must be the same that some call Moby Dick."

"Moby Dick?" shouted Ahab. "Do ye know the white whale then, Tash?"

"Does he fan-tail a little curious, sir, before he goes down?" said the Gay-Header deliberately.

"And has he a curious spout, too," said Daggoo, "very bushy, even for a parmacetty, and mighty quick, Captain Ahab?"

"And he have one, two, three--oh! good many iron in him hide, too, Captain," cried Queequeg disjointedly, "all twiske-tee be-twisk, like him--him--" faltering hard for a word, and screwing his hand round and round as though uncorking a bottle--"like him--him--"

"Corkscrew!" cried Ahab, "aye, Queequeg, the harpoons lie all twisted and wrenched in him; aye, Daggoo, his spout is a big one, like a whole shock of wheat, and white as a pile of our Nantucket wool after the great annual sheep-shearing; aye, Tashtego, and he fan-tails like a split jib in a squall. Death and devils! men, it is Moby Dick ye have seen--Moby Dick--Moby Dick!"

from Melvilles Moby Dick

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